Assigning The Top Table
As modern weddings become more informal many are choosing not to be bound by tradition and have moved away from the customary top table seating arrangement in the following order. Chief Bridesmaid – Groom's Father – Bride's Mother -Groom - Bride - Bride's Father - Groom's Mother - Best Man - you can choose other variations if you like - for instance, paring the groom’s parents next to the groom & the bride’s parents next to the bride. In addition, you may want to pass on having a top table and instead have the popular bridal table where the bride & groom are flanked by the groomsmen & bridesmaids, or even sit with other friends and family. Remember, wedding seating etiquette is not set in stone.
Seating Tips for Other Tables
1. Seating your guests at tables with just one family group will let them feel comfortable. but it will likely cause a lack of mingling and separate groups hovering together and ignoring other guests. In contrast, a table where no one knows anyone else will be uncomfortable for many of your guests. Ideally, you should attempt to arrange a mix of guests at each table so that everyone knows a few people. Think about the ages and interests of your guests so that you can make sure that each table is likely to get along and have fun.
2. Where to sit singles is something you should consider as well. While you might want to be cupid, this could backfire and make your single guests uncomfortable. You should try to avoid a singles table if possible.
3. If you are using round tables, the rule of thumb is to assign seats for males and females alternately around the table. If you are using long tables, try to seat couples opposite one another and then alternate male and females along the table.
4. The tables closest to the bride and groom should be assigned to the closest friends and family.
5. Assign each table a name or number. You may consider having themes for the table names - for example the names could be people, places, or objects that mean something to you to you as a couple. Most importantly, theme names remove the perceived hierarchy of tables. In order for you wedding guests to easily find their table, you should have a name card for each table created.
6. Create name place cards if you are assigning wedding guests to specific seats. On these cards you could also show any menu choices or indicate who your vegetarian guests are. The waiting staff will really appreciate this and it will allow them to provide better service without mistakes. Also, you should provide a copy of your wedding seating plan to the venue so that they can see where people should be seated.
Creating the Wedding Seating Plan
Start planning your wedding seating arrangement early. As most of your close friends and family will be attending, you can start doing this before all your RSVPs have come in even if they haven’t formally replied yet.
To start creating your plan, obtain a general idea from the wedding venue whether you’ll be using round or long tables or a mixture of both, how the tables will be arranged, and know what the maximum capacity each table will be.
Arranging the plan can take a quite a long time and likely will require many revisions. Some couples cut up pieces of paper when doing this for each guest and table and use these to try out different layouts.
